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NO HAITIAN VOODOO, NO HEADLESS CHICKENS
So Cowboy’s training camp started a few days ago. And I realize that many in the blog world, including my partner in life crime, don’t give two shits about that. Well I do.
We’re going to the first preseason game against the Colts and I’m trying to get us geared up and ready. A little over a week ago I read about Phil Garner and his idea to place a voodoo curse on Carlos Zambrano. This got me thinking…what in the black arts could I do to help my beloved Boys this season?
Lucky for me, a framed picture of Tony Romo fell into my lap.
Each night I light candles around it chanting various things about “not sucking” and “not fucking this up.” I kiss it each night before I go to sleep and I occasionally sprinkle it with a potion I made out of High Life (holy water), my perfume (Chanel), Powerade (for the sport liquid), a ground up hydrocodone (borrowed from TO), and a pinch of sea salt (for flavor).
Sometimes I turn the lights down really low and softly play Journey’s “Don’t stop believing.”
So if you do really well this season Tony, you’re welcome. And if you don’t, I’ve wasted good High Life.
[Shout out to Shaun for the Romo pic. Readers who give us stuff are the tits.]
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Lauren
About Me
Classy dame. College student. Short girl, however what I lack in height I make up for in breast. I make Steve Mcqueen look like a student driver. I once did a 45 second keg stand. Erin Andrews and I were in the same sorority. I will out karaoke the best of them. The way to my heart involves classic rock, margaritas, tex-mex and ice cream.
Mandy
About Me
Die-hard Steelers fan. Stuck in Texas, but forever loyal to the 'Burgh. Non-stop talker, what a rocker, green-eyed murder in a size 3 dress.
